It's been a while since me an Giblets seen a real pie. Lotsa imposter pies, like the pirog, which tries to fool you with it's puffy crust an fruity innards, but upon closer inspection we've determined that it's not actually made a pie.
Then, some days when we're sittin' down for lunch, they give us a plate a this stuff that's supposedly pie. These 'pies' are individually-wrapped for your health and better concealment a the truth. The package proudly asserts it contains a 'choco-pie'. It's doubly misleadin', because we're sittin' at a Russian Table, so we're expectin' Russian food and we get 'choco-pies' an then they turn out to be unappetizing little coated spongecakey sandwich cookies.
So, I stand up with my 'choco-pie' and heartily declare it's unpieness an then Giblets throws his at the wall, an it bounces off and hits Little Debbie in the back a the head, an she takes one look at it an says they're copying her an runs off to tell her mother an the U.S. Patent Office. Then someone suggests that we go to Stolle and get some pirog, which is like pie. But it's not. So I sit down and stare sadly at my half eaten banana.
All I'm lookin' for is somethin with a normal crust, maybe made a graham crackers or maybe just pie crust, an normal pie insides, but I'm not seein' any pie in Russia. Musta ate it all back durin' the blockade. That explains it.
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